The Conclusion of the Battle of Tunnel Hill

Look!  I really did follow through!  I'm giving myself 12.5 gold stars.  So, when we last left our heroine she and her husband were on the battle field.  One thing I haven't yet told you about the battle was that it was the most humid and hot time I have ever spent in Georgia.  Sam and I were trying to stay cool under an umbrella, but our courage waned as the heat and the battle wore on and our confusion mounted.

I knew when I began covering this war that though the battle itself was important, I wanted to capture the gritty truth of the human drama of what was unfolding before us.  The face of an old man watching his son go off to a reenactment,

the worried wife who wonders if her husband will be one of the first to go,

and most importantly the nurses who get out on the battle field in HOOP SKIRTS to tend to the wounded in 90 degree weather!

There is no way I am woman enough for that job.  In fact, perhaps one of the most shocking things about my coverage of this battle is that Sam and I

were so overheated and parched that we went to get lemonade and missed the end of the battle!  Christiane Amanpour never does anything like that.  Oh, the shame!  However, can I just say in my defense that this was the best lemonade of my life and I would do it again in a heartbeat.

I really like how they made such an effort to have their products take you back in time.  One of my favorite parts of this event was wandering through the camps (both teams camp out the night before the battle with gear from the time period) and seeing all the fun people were having with historical accuracy.

By the time Sam and I got back to the front, we learned that despite heavy casualties early on the South had won the battle (which means that the North gets to win the next day because in reenactment land you very sensibly take turns).  The conquered blue team lined up to shoot their guns at the end of the battle.

I thought to myself, "Oh good, a chance to redeem my lack of footage of the end of the battle."  I would get a picture of all the guns firing at once.  Instead, I caught this,

which I think powerfully captures how scary and loud it is when a lot of guns are fired at once.

The Battle of Tunnel Hill

Little did I expect when I moved to the south that I would become a war correspondent.  But when I heard that Sam's home town of Tunnel Hill, GA had a Civil War Reenactment coming up, I knew that you would need up to the minute (or at least within the week) coverage.  I woke up so excited--this was my first war!  Taking pictures in the car, I you can see I had all the intensity of Liza Minnelli gearing up for a show:

My sweet Sam was also looking forward to our adventures, but he to had make a stop on the way.  As sometimes happens in married life, one person is really excited and chomping at the bit to get to the scene of battle, and the other person has to go to the bank and do important business and leaves the war correspondent in the car for 45 minutes.  I had to ask myself, what would Christiane Amanpour do in a situation like this?

Perhaps just cover the story that was unfolding before her...

I think the bun is the most compelling aspect of this photo narrative

At last, important business done, we were able to go off to war.  The first thing to note is that the Battle of Tunnel Hill, historically speaking, is just the tiniest bit imaginary.  There were a few skirmishes in the area, but according to Sam no one died and there was never a real battle.  That being said, the fighting was still intense.

What you will notice is that throughout most of this coverage, I have pretty much no idea what is going on.  The blue and grey teams started out shooting at each other from a distance of about 50 ft for the first part of the battle, but no one died.  Sam and I theorized that this could be because none of the soldiers wanted to be taken out that soon.

After awhile people started riding around on horses, and the cannon fire began.

Unfortunately, that's when we started getting some wounded and dead people.  This poor (and ambitious!) guy was blown right off his horse.

The grey team seemed to be losing more people and soon the dead were scattered everywhere.

The great part about being a reenactment correspondent is that there is hope even for the dead, who sometimes miraculously are able to sit up and keep an eye on the battle even in their state of demise.

Still confusion reigned.  Who was winning?  What was happening?  I expressed this to my Sam.

While that may be true, I bet all of you want to know who actually won.  Well, stay tuned because tomorrow I really will tell you.  Now, I recognize that I'm kind of a false promiser.  More than once I've told you I would finish something and (fickle woman!) didn't do it.  Just try to have faith in me.  

J.O.B.

I interrupt our previously scheduled stay-cation to bring you an important update.  Friends, having been employment challenged for a while now, it gives me great pleasure to announce to you that I have work! Where could a heroine

who clearly loves fun accessories,

adores the latest in home decor,

I call this Spicy Susan

and is seriously addicted to spending time with people from far away places

Sam and my lovely friends from Burma

find a job?

Ten Thousand Villages!

Sam says he isn't quite sure how he is going to feel once I start making my millions in fair trade and surpass his income, but I told him we didn't have to cross that bridge this week.  For now, part time, temporary, holiday season me will be excited about working at a place where I've loved shopping for years.  

You probably thought I was done, huh?  Nope.  It was a big day!  In addition to that, I may start doing a little counseling on the side.  I've talked to someone about renting space in their practice.  So don't get too excited all at once, but hold on to your hats because who knows what will happen next!

As if all this wasn't enough, I am SO excited to tell you that I'm yet again being sent on location to cover Georgia for my blog.  The next time we meet, I'll be giving you updates from one of the most southern things you can possibly do:

Reenact the Civil War!!!  Stay tuned to see who wins.  

Sam and Sarah's Ultimate Staycation, Day 1

Last Saturday morning found our hero and heroine with a glorious three day weekend spread out before them like a the scenic expanse of a very empty canyon.  The heroine (having spent a good deal of time and money in a counseling program to learn that she is ever so slightly depressive and needs structure in her life) suggested that if she did not stop sitting on the couch like a lump the faint halo of grumpiness around her could degenerate quickly to boredom, hypochondria, or crying for no real--how do you say it--reason (echoes of earlier blogs, are we catching a theme here?).  Sam, being the excellent husband and supporter (even proponent) of hair brained schemes that he is, agreed that this called for an old fashioned stay-cation.  We made a list of all the things we wanted to do and began the merriment.

But.

As so often happens in the Chalkboard House, the sweetness of life is mixed with the bitter.  And the bitter, bitter pill of this stay-cation is that due to a technical failure that was no one but Kodak's fault all the photographs we took of it were lost with nothing but a "memory card failure error" message to explain why.

Obviously, we were upset.  What could I do?  Not blog?  Never!  Only on days when I don't feel like it could this be an acceptable excuse.  No, there was only one solution:  I was forced to find random pictures from the internet to try and recreate the events of our stay-cation.  

Day 1

Our theme for this day was Atlanta (this may seem like an obvious theme for someone on a stay-cation in Atlanta, but roll with me, I like having theme days).

The first stop to represent Atlanta of course had to be Target.  We live large, what can I day?  Why Target?  Because I

(here played by Lynda Carter as Wonder Woman, because I love her and always will) needed a bike for further adventures

(my bike is played by Wonder Woman's invisible plane, because unfortunately for her she never had an invisible bike).

I hate to break things into rankings, but my favorite part of Day 1 may actually have been riding my new bike around the Target parking lot and the thrill of getting it into the Honda Civic when we thought there was no possible way

(Just pretend the snuggie/lamp/ducky/frame is my bike).  After accomplishing mission GSaB, we went home, recuperated, ate leftovers, and went, to....

The Cyclorama!  This depiction of the Battle of Atlanta is the largest painting and diorama in the world!  It was a lot of fun.  At the gift shop, they had a hat and beard you could put on to look like Abraham Lincoln.  I took a hilarious picture with this on:

(shown here as Wonder Woman and Abraham Lincoln morphed together).  Of course, since we were in the area we had to stop at Atlanta's gourmet ice cream shop, Morelli's, were they make incredible ice cream in crazy flavors like maple bacon brittle, and coconut jalapeno.  Sam kept it traditional with butter pecan

He looked much better than this picture of Vince Vaughn with vanilla ice cream.  And I had Elvis Lives

which is banana, peanut butter, and chocolate.  That would have been enough for one day, but I didn't get my super hero status just by randomly downloading pictures of others.  No!  We kept the party going with a bike ride along the Chattahootchee and a movie night.

Day one was a major success!

City of the Dead

Menacing title, huh?  Well, I don't use it lightly.  After having done extensive research using the infallible resources of the internet and the American Institute of Paranormal Psychology, I can confirm it is 100ish% true. Savannah, Georgia, known primarily for being incredibly beautiful

is also (dum, dum, DUUUMMM!!!) the city of the dead.

You have to hum the Twilight Zone theme song to view this picture.

Now I know there are going to be skeptics out there who don't believe that Blue Orb Ghost Tours are really all that scientific.  Can you deny HISTORY, skeptics!?!  Can you deny that the Yellow Fever, ancient Native American Burial grounds (desecrated and now cursed) and various other disasters led to 25,000 unmarked graves in Savannah that the city was then built over?  Can you deny that any normal citizen just walking along practically trips over bones if they dig only a few feet below the surface at any point in the city?   Can you really look at me and say that you don't believe Voo Doo Witch Doctors even now constantly go to Savannah's squares to dig up bones for their dark arts?

I know that even with these compelling facts you may doubt me.  And I can have compassion for that.  After all, who am I but a humble blogger and tourist?  You can doubt the information I have presented to you from semi-credible sources.  But will you not be moved by my own story?  Here is what I know from personal experience:

Fact #1
Within hours of arriving in the city of Savannah, my brother and sister who I have known their whole lives started acting like crazy people:

Even Sam and I struggled under the influence of this powerful force:

Fact #2
Our hotel was obviously haunted.  How else can you explain the following phenomena?
*  All the ice machines in the hotel "mysteriously" didn't work
*  There was white powder and bits of toilet paper on the floor of the bathroom before we got there
*  The carpet had a strange smell, exactly like the smell Blue Orb Ghost Expert Alabama Tobias described as being the smell of death
*  Minutes after we got in the pool a storm with thunder, lightening, and rain began and we barely made it out of the pool alive
*  When we got up in the morning for the complimentary breakfast the hotel provided it wasn't there


Fact #3

We actually photographed the ghosts our own selves on the Blue Orb Tour.  In these pictures you will obviously see the face of a little girl killed by her father in the windows of this house.  If you look carefully you can also see Toto and the Witch of the West, but that may be a different phenomena:

And is it just a coincidence that Manda and Danny have a strange orange glow while viewing the haunted photos in the haunted hotel?

Of all of us, I think Sam was most affected (probably because he is most in touch with the paranormal).  Days later, he still wore a haunted expression, long after we had left...The City of the Dead.

Open for Business

Friends!  After days of rearranging junk in boxes and stuffing it into closets, drawers and under beds, I'm so pleased to announce that the B & B more commonly known as Sam and Sarah's spare room is now open for business!!!

This NEW queen mattress is featured in our guest suite.  It was hauled up the stairs solo (Sam offered to come home at lunch and help, but somebody has been watching too many Wonder Woman reruns) by me using my incredible upper body strength (thanks to Sam's personal training efforts at the gym), a good deal of leveraging against the stairs, the railings, my face...and just a hint of motivational cursing under my breath.  Linda Carter makes it look so easy...

Not pictured here but absolutely included in your stay is our foosball table (at no extra charge!) and our air mattress, which we use for camping and accommodating larger parties.  I think that with these two beds and our giant chair we can easily sleep 8-12 with confidence.

We have also added an exotic palm plant for your viewing pleasure.  I know, when do the luxuries stop?  Well, they don't stop until you've had your name writ large on the Chalkboard of fame and a new pillow made in your honor!

This isn't just hypothetical, folks.  My brother and sister really did come as our first guests at the B & B.  More like the B & BL&D plus multiple snacks.  We ate more food than was even remotely reasonable:

These kids know how to travel!  Not since Megan in Massachusetts 2006 have I seen people pack so much in to so few days.  Sam and I were left 7 collective pounds heavier and crying for days from exhaustion (okay, the crying was just me).

In the next couple of posts (which I promise won't be weeks apart, really, truly) I plan to take you with us on a tour of Atlanta and beyond.  But for today, I want to highlight the Atlanta Aquarium.  This place is just so darn cool.  And...wait for it...right now, for a limited time only you can go and see it for $15!!!  It is usually $26.  I know.  Book. your. flights. now.  You could save $11 if you get here before November.  Case closed.  I'll be making reservations starting today, first come, first serve.

This bad boy is a whale shark.  The Atlanta Aquarium is the largest in the world with 8 million gallons of water.  We sat in front of this tank for about an hour.  It is so relaxing.  Another favorite of mine are these little buddies:

For me, the aquarium is an incredibly relaxing art museum.  So anyway, if the fish haven't sold you (and obviously that is impossible) then stay tuned for more fun from Mand and Danny's Trip to Georgia!